Unsuccessfully Promising God
Question
Hello Rabbi,
I promised Gd out loud i wouldn’t say swear words anymore but because i am so used to using them i keep saying them unintentionally.
I also promised Gd i wouldn’t think about intimate matters anymore but again it keeps happening inadvertently.
What should i do ? Im trying to control but its really hard. i really want to stop being a bad person. also im afraid because i swore Gd will punish me much harsher.
Thank You for reading my concern rabbi
May Gd bless you
Answers
It is a mistake to make definitive statements like, “I will not do such-and-such anymore”. As you have learned it simply sets a person up for failure. The best thing to do is to make a commitment to TRY not to curse anymore or to have inappropriate thoughts. That way you can do your best to try and you can be proud of the all the times that you succeeded even though there will inevitably be times when you are not so successful in controlling yourself.
In any event, God is not going to punish you because you made a commitment that you cannot manage right now. God knows perfectly well – even better than you – what you are capable of and what you are not. And He takes every single detail into account when judging you.
Please accept my personal blessing that, over time, you are successful in overcoming your weaknesses and that you continue growing closer to God every single day.
Best wishes from the AskTheRabbi.org Team