Memorial Service Reading

Question

My father recently passed away. Most of our family are practicing Christian’s of various denominations, his wife of 40 years a Christian scientist. To my knowledge my father did not practice or show interest in religious activity until about 11 years ago. At 70 he began studying Hebrew and Judaism. He was serious and diligent in his daily studies and practice. The intellectual and spiritual growth he experienced seemed to bring him a great deal of joy and peace of mind. His memorial service is in 6 weeks at a US National Cemetery, there will be military honors and a chaplain. His siblings have suggested that we open with New Testament John 14:1-3.

While the overall sentiment is lovely and I understand their choice, I do not believe my father would have wanted any Christian readings at his funeral. Is there a passage or prayer from the Old Testament or in Jewish writing, such as the Kel Maleh Rachamim, that would be appropriate for his service?

Thank you for your assistance.

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Answers

  1. I am so sorry to hear of your father’s passing.

    There are many passages in the Bible that might be appropriate for the memorial service, but, not knowing your late father, I am not sure how to suggest a particular passage. Personally, I feel that it would make sense to speak with a spiritual mentor who knew your father and ask them for help in choosing the right passage.

    Please allow me to offer an unsolicited comment. While I truly understand your desire to have something read at the memorial service that you feel your late father would have appreciated, I do not think that it is something that you should insist upon if it is going to be the cause of any tension or ill feelings with your father’s siblings. However important it is for you that the reading reflect your father’s beliefs, I am sure he would not want anyone to be hurt or upset because of them.

    Best wishes from the AskTheRabbi.org Team