Emuna and Bitachon

Question

I always have questions about Hashem even though I grew up frum.

Whenever I read Stories of emuna and bituchon I cringe.

I read enough hashkafa already and I still don’t understand.

I am in therapy for childhood abuse so I know my questions make sense.

But still, do I have hope that one day I will understand that I don’t have to understand?

How can I read articles without feeling pain and resistance to every word that connects to God?

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Answers

  1. The Just Ask! - AskTheRabbi.org Team

    It is absolutely understandable that you have problems building your relationship with Hashem after everything that you went through as a child. And I think that it makes perfect sense that you find books on Emunah and Bitachon to be difficult to read and absorb.

    I don’t know if you have tried reading any of Rabbi Ezriel Tauber’s works. If not, I would suggest that perhaps you try some. What makes Rabbi Tauber’s books different from anyone else’s? He also experienced enormous trauma in his childhood (he was a young child in Eastern Europe during the Holocaust) and was able to write about Emunah and Bitachon from his own personal encounters with evilness and difficulties. He also writes in a way that does not “talk down” to the reader, but rather from a vantage point of complete empathy.

    Best wishes from the AskTheRabbi.org Team