Cousin Who Eats Kitniyot
Question
I have a cousin, who along with her husband, are Ashkenazim who eat kitniyot on Pesach in rebellious defiance of Ashkenazi guidelines. Her husband is a member of an internet group that believes kitniyot laws should be abolished. They want us to come spend the first two days of Pesach with them. What should we do?
Answers
First, I think that it is important to begin by saying that kitniot is not chametz. And while it is true that that the Ashkenazi custom is not to eat kitnios on Pesach, it is not a Biblical transgression.
Having said that, if you wish to spend Pesach with them, you need to tell them gently but clearly that you do not eat kitniot on Pesach. Let them know that if it is too difficult for them to cater to your Halachic needs, that is fine, and that you will look forward to meeting up with them over Chol Hamoed instead. If they try to pressure you into following their “custom,” I suggest you thank them very much for the invitation and tell them quite clearly you cannot eat kitniot.
In any event, there is no Halachic issue with eating food that has been cooked in pots and pans that have had kitniot cooked in them.
Best wishes from the AskTheRabbi.org Team