Miscellaneous

What are the laws about sitting next to someone of the opposite sex on the subway? I just moved to New York City this week to start a new job and I barely know anyone here yet. I don’t have a car and the subway and buses are the only practical way of getting around. I have rarely used public transportation before. The subway trains and stations are almost always crowded, and it’s impossible to avoid physical contact with women. I have always scrupulously observed negiah and been careful not to touch a woman even accidentally, but this is impossible. The other day, I sat down in a seat with a vacant adjacent seat when I got on. Not too long after, a young non-Jewish woman wearing a tight-fitting sleeveless short dress got on and took the seat next to me. She acted friendly in a flirtatious manner and engaged me in conversation. I responded to her friendliness and chatted with her for about half an hour until my stop because I didn’t want to hurt her feelings. I couldn’t get up because I was surrounded by standing riders, also mostly female, squeezed in like sardines. I see lots of Orthodox Jews ride the subway, although I don’t know any personally yet, and I don’t know what they do about this. I will have to use the crowded subway almost every day for the foreseeable future.

I work together with a blind woman who my boss considers a valuable asset to the company. Until recently, she got rides to and from work from another coworker who was female. That coworker retired last week. This leaves me as the only one who can provide her transportation, and my boss specifically asked me to drive her to and from work as if it’s now part of my job description. Where we work, it is necessary to park two blocks away from the office and walk several minutes down the street. The blind woman has to walk with me and hold on to my arm as I walk to and from the car and to guide her. For the first few days, all was fine. Then an acquaintance of mine who knows I am married but has never met my wife saw me and emailed me and told me that he saw me walking together with my wife. He assumed this woman was my wife because it appeared she was clinging to me in a romantic way. I explained she was not my wife, but a blind woman I am assisting. I have been married to the same woman for over 30 years. My wife very much supports me helping a blind woman because she considers it a chesed. The blind woman also is married and her husband is appreciative of anyone who helps her. There is no negiah issue here because this woman does not make contact with my body, but she holds my loose fitting jacket with one of her hands. She only touches the fabric, away from my body, and not my skin. I don’t even feel her. But I am wondering, is there an problem in Jewish law if to the eyes of others, it gives the mistaken impression we are romantically involved?