Am I Good or Bad?
Question
Dear Rabbi,
In the eyes of G-d, am I more of a good or a bad person? Will G-d give me more of a reward or a punishment?
I will tell you about who I am. To start, here’s the good I have done. I have worked as a firefighter for over 20 years and saved lots of lives. I have performed lots of random acts of kindness. I give lots of money to charitable causes. And I volunteer my time to help underprivileged children. I also teach about fire safety. And I donate blood every two months.
Now here’s some of the bad I have done. I abandoned the practice Orthodox Judaism where I was brought up and where I had a lot of unpleasant experiences. Since then, I have routinely badmouthed the Jewish religion, the community of my upbringing, the yeshiva I went to, lots of rabbis, and the Torah. I am married to a Christian woman and have two sons. I don’t consider myself Christian, but I occasionally accompany her to church events and I celebrate Christian holidays in addition to Hanukkah.
According to Jewish belief, what am I considered in the eyes of G-d? How does G-d judge me?